On Track

I am on track!

I am sticking pretty close to my diet plan of only eating a piece of fruit and then the Nutrisystem meals during the week, salad and chicken on Saturday and taking Sunday off - but staying within as much reason as I can. I've lost the holiday weight but I really need to stop stepping on the scale because it just discourages me. I'm already stuck at a plateau and I've not even started to hit the 'fat' weight. But this is going to be my year and I am going to do this.

DiscoverCard is paid off and Visa is paid off. I have $4,800 or so left on MasterCard. As high as that is, it's the lowest I've been in years and years so I feel real good about it. The plan is to pay $500 a month until I get my inheritance and then pay the balance at that point. It should be down to about $2,800 by then. And then I will be debt free. That's an amazing feeling. I haven't been credit card debt free in over 20 years. 

The $500 will then be directed to a Roth IRA for future years. And I will never be in credit card debt again. My solemn vow.

Update

So I ate only Nutrisystem food Wednesday through Friday, lean protein and salad on Saturday and anything I wanted today - Sunday. I might be able to continue on this trend - but I'm not sure it will help me lose weight. I will definitely do it until March when I run out of Nutrisystem food - then I can reevaluate.

I have spent a few more dollars than I've wanted to this week but I have found myself with Tom (no job - no money) and Charlie (no job - no money). I feel guilty making them pay for stuff when they have no income while I have not only my income but Shawn's. So I've been paying. Guess the secret there is to limit my time with them while out and about. Sad.

Well, here we try again. A new year and back to the same old resolutions. Still getting my life in order.

I have good news on the financial issue - I've paid off Discover and Visa and will make a chunk payment tomorrow on Mastercard. All thanks to Mom and Dad. I confessed to Shawn last night that I am terrified that I will pay off these credit cards only to run them up again - and there will be no more Mom and Dad bailing me out. I think the Discover and Mastercard will be put away and I will only use the Visa. And I will pay that off over the course of the month, not just the end of the month. I've heard that's a great way to do it and it helps your credit rating. But it still really scares me; I've often said I wouldn't 'return to the evil' in the past and always have.

Bad news on the weight issue - I am at my highest weight EVER (see the 'return to the evil' comment above!) I canceled the Nutrisystem plan as it wasn't very helpful. I have three months worth in the basement which I will start on tomorrow. The updated plan is to eat ONLY the Nutrisystem meals and a piece of fruit or two Monday through Friday, salads and lean meats on Saturday and take Sunday off until the Nutrisystem meals are finished. By then I might be in a place where I can do the salad and lean meats Monday through Saturday, still taking Sunday off. We will see - I just know that if I don't get this thing under control soon, I will suffer a great health issue, be it a heart attack, stroke or diabetes. I ain't a young chicken any more that can get away with extra weight.

I am also going to start asking God for help with it.

I Won't Give Up

August didn't work very well for me. Maintained most of the month, got frustrated, went off plan and put on weight! But I won't give up - we are now in September and I will start again. Six weeks before vacation - I can lose maybe 12 pounds if I stay diligent.

I am afraid to look at my credit card bills this month. I may just take what I still owe Visa out of savings and pay it off. It would be OK if it wasn't for the monthly $225 for Nutrisystem. I definitely cannot stay on that plan for too many more months. I'll have to give myself till the end of the year to work on that plan and then it will be up to me to portion again.

Shawn is paying for our trip to New Orleans so that will cost me pretty much nothing - maybe I'll pay for the museum tickets or the swamp ride or something. I want to take him to Myrtle Beach, too. I would pay for that. I put together a packet on Expedia that includes airfare, four nights at a hotel on the beach and a car rental for $1,300. That's a decent price, isn't it? Shawn doesn't seem too keen on going, though. He may save me from myself. But if he agrees to it, I will take the money out of savings - that's why it's there, right?

Update

So, the Nutrisystem diet is working, slowly but surely. Down 14 pounds with about 30 to go. This month I was able to go online and pick out my own foods so I anticipate an easier go of it - some of the stuff on their 'favorites' list is awful! Lots of pizza in August!

With Dan and the girls here, my budgeting went out the window. I won't get Visa paid off till the end of the year now. And I actually have a balance on Discover this month - half paid now and half will be paid in September. Still plan to have only one outstanding credit card to deal with in 2013.

Back in the Saddle

I am back in the saddle, getting my diet and fiances in shape. I joined Nutrisystem so I don't have to weigh, measure or count anything (mostly). Just open, heat and eat. Lost ten pound in a month - have about 35 to go to get to my fighting weight again. I can do it.

Working on the finances. I should have two more payments for Visa, but with Nutrisystem having to go on a credit card (and it not being cheap!) I might have to take another month or two to get Visa paid off (Nutrisystem goes on Discover which gets paid off every month). I figure as long as I get Visa paid off by the end of the year, I'm on track. Then I can aim all my funds at Mastercard and get that one done.

Mid-Year Slip Up

Been awhile - I've been embarrassed to write. Fell off the diet wagon and put on all the weight I had taken off, plus a few pounds. Fell off the debt repayment wagon and added probably $800+ to credit cards.

I've joined Nutrisystem - I figure I need to stop obsessing over food - weighing, measuring, counting - all of it. I need someone to take over my food intake for a while so I can just forget about it. Since I can't afford a personal chef, I am trying the next best thing - a diet plan that includes packaged foods. The cost alone will help entice me to stay on program - at $215 a month, I am going to make it work! This is day 3.

Credit debt went up because of the diet food and the week-end get away I planned for Shawn. The hotel room and dinner train went on credit. AND I had some unexpected costs (securing my office with a locking file cabinet and a door lock). The plan there is to take out of savings whatever I owe on Discover and continue the $400 payment on Visa and the $200 payment on Mastercard. And stop spending again. I suppose one month slip-up isn't all bad as long as I cover the debt immediately (no carry over) and continue on my plan. I should still have Visa paid this year - maybe a month later than I had hoped.

Down, but not out! Wish me luck---

Giving Up

Weight is back to the start - I have just given up on losing it. I guess I am simply destined to be overweight and unhappy. I find myself searching the house for anything. I don't want it, I don't like it but I eat it regardless. I don't know what's wrong - I guess it's stress eating. Bailey moves in in a few weeks so maybe my four-walks-a-day routine with him will help. Can't eat and walk at the same time (some folks can but not me). I am disgusted with myself.

I'm doing better with finances. I should have Visa paid by August/September! Then I can sink all of it ($600) a month in MasterCard. Even at that rate I'll be paying the card for the next two/two-and-a-half years. But I feel good about digging myself out of this financial mess I've been in for 20 years. The day I become credit card debt-free will be one of the proudest days of my life. Right up there with the day I got my Masters.

Update

Well, it's not bad - I lost about 6 pounds in February, though I have struggled to do so. Seems I lose a pound, put 1.5 back on, carry that for a few days, drop back down then lose another one. It's two steps up and one step back. But I'm doing OK. My goal this month is to get to my next 10- pounds - gone mark - I'm about 5 pounds away. I would REALLY like to get down to 158 by the end of March but I'm not sure how realistic that would be - that's about 8 pounds or two pounds a week. But I won't get discouraged!

I am also slowly conquering my debt. I put $2,000 of my performance bonus on Visa. I think I will transfer another $2,000 from a few savings accounts to checking and put that on Visa, too. That should take my Visa down to $1,500 or so which I will have paid off by the end of the year. (That's in addition to continuing to put $200 each month on MasterCard.) Then when Visa is paid, $500 a month will go to MasterCard and that should be paid off in two years. I should be debt free in three years. Unless something bad comes up, like we have to replace a major household item or one of us loses our job. But I am making strides and won't get discouraged!

Slight Hiccup

This has been a hard week with the diet. I have been cheating with chocolate. I blame it on the time of the month and I vow to do better tomorrow. I haven't destroyed my work - just stalled it. I will NOT give up this challenge. I WILL live a healthier life.

I decided to put my performance bonus toward the Visa card. I struggled with that - having that cash in my savings would be wonderful. But, that card seems to not be shrinking although I'm not really using it. It needs a quick shot of lots of money. Hopefully the bonus will be effective enough that I can get the card paid off within two years. Maybe two and a half.

I'm doing OK with spending - working really hard to not get nonsense stuff, though I did just get a few DVDs. One was my reward for dropping my first 10 pounds and two were stupid purchases. I seriously need to consider a second job this summer. And we have the promise of overtime due to so many on the team taking their sabbaticals. I need to take advantage of that, too. Even if it kills me.

Update

Weight - I was doing SO WELL until today. I didn't eat much of anything (due to having a house full of guests for a niece's birthday party) so when they left, I ate a whole pop-can of Pillsbury Crescent rolls...with cheese. I bet I put three pounds on with that stunt. And I had met my 10-pound weight loss for the month. Totally blew it. I will be back on the wagon tomorrow and maybe I'll get rid of that mistake by Wednesday or Thursday. I won't let it discourage me and I won't use it as an excuse to quit. Not this time.

Wednesday is the first of February and I plan on kicking things up a notch by adding a bit of exercise to my plan. I think I'll do 10 minutes on the treadmill/bike before starting my day. Not much, but I don't think jumping in with 30-minute work outs is realistic. 10-minute work outs for two weeks then I'll add another 10 (5 on the bike and 5 on the treadmill) on the 15th. That will give me a 20-minute work out before I start my day. Then in March I'll try adding a walk after work. And I've started accompanying Shawn to the gym every-other Sunday (he can sign me in as a guest twice a month). I thought about joining yoga but decided to hold off on that. I start working 10 hours on Thursdays which is the same day as beginner's yoga and I want to make sure I'm not overly exhausted from the long hours first. But I have a plan!

Financially, I'm not doing as well. I ended up charging about $300 this month - Dan's birthday dinner, a trip to Kohl's and a trip to Wal-Mart. I made just shy of $60,000 last year - the most I've ever made, and I am still struggling to make ends meet. I just don't understand it. I am not nearly as confident with my financial plan as I am with my weight-loss plan.

New Year, New me?

With the ringing in of 2012, I am again forced to reflect on myself. I had an epiphany last week - my issues with food and money are just manifestations of a chaos going on inside me. I've been identifying other manifestations such as the horrid condition of my once-stellar nails and the piles of statements in my office closet (and my office in general). I'm feeling good that as I can identify these manifestations, I can conquer them. I'm off to a good start with my diet and I am not blowing through this paycheck. My nails are primed for repair and I have 'tackle the office closet' as my To Do Action Item for next week (this week's Action Item is to put Christmas away).

I have a long ways to go but I feel good having a plan of action. Tracking my dietary intake and financial outgo, dedicating each week to a different Action Item, and keeping polish on my nails. All steps in the right direction.

I can do this.

Update

Well, the Christmas week was a bust both financially and health-related. I ate what I wanted and spent what I wanted.

We received a surprise bonus at work - a month's salary. Instead of socking it all away, I went shopping. I took Tom's girls to a movie and dinner ($60) and bought Shawn a nice diamond-accented bracelet ($275). Add a few other 'extras' and I'm pretty sure I've spent at least half of the bonus. I'll give things till Friday to clear, check the bank account and move whatever is left over.

I ate whatever I came across. I now weigh 180 pounds - more than I have ever weighed. AND that's with walking Bailey at least an hour a day all week long. I am so sick of eating. I think most of the junk is out of the house so maybe I can start my New Year's Diet tomorrow.

I'm trying to not feel like a total failure with life.

Update

I made the appropriate payments to Visa and MasterCard for December. I am almost out of money - December is tough. Gifts are the least of the money-grabbers; postage, Christmas cards, copies of the annual End-of-Year letter, batteries, last minute contributions to all the charities you put off month after month. Before you know it, you have eaten through your paycheck and have nothing to add to savings.

I have been writing down everything I spend to see if I can find the 'latte' - little indulges I don't need but get anyway. I have a lot of lattes - a hot chocolate here, a magazine there. I guess the good news is when I run out of money, the lattes are finished for the month.

My diet is non-existent. A bad time at work has me eating almost uncontrollably. As soon as I finish one item, I'm in the kitchen looking for the next. Doesn't matter what it is - I even ate dry cereal yesterday before breaking in to the frozen cookie dough and baking 10 chocolate chocolate-chip cookies which I inhaled. Instead of learning a lesson from the tummy ache later in the evening, I went and did the same thing again today! What is wrong with me?

The only exercise I've had this week is climbing the stairs after attacking the kitchen. I am no where near my goal for the month and won't reach it at this rate. I am letting the stresses of my job and the long overtime hours get the better of me.

Update

I have been unsuccessful in starting a diet regime - I find myself snacking unconsciously all the time. I don't know why I have this horrid urge to eat - I'm filling an empty slot with food instead of what it really needs. What I really need is companionship, activity and entertainment. Sitting at home day after day, working in front of a computer and entertaining myself in front of a TV isn't good. Unfortunately, I am stumped over what I should do instead. I can't afford to go anywhere and I know no one to go with. Maybe I'll do better this week.

I have determined that by paying Visa $450 a month every month (no skipping) and using the card ONLY for gas purchases, I can have my Visa card paid in about 17 months. That's a year and a half. And then I would still have my Mastercard to contend with (I would pay $200 a month, every month, toward Mastercard during my Visa attack.) Seems fairly daunting, doesn't it? But waiting around for my inheritance to cover a bill has become a joke - we are never going to sell Mom and Dad's house; not in this market. And even if we do, the back taxes and penalties are going to suck up a good portion of any profit made by the sale. So, I have to dig my own way out of this quicksand - and I will. I will.

The Beginning

I've decided that to tackle my issues, I must be honest about them. No more skirting around the facts and sticking my head in the proverbial sand. This blog will serve as my therapist, forcing me to really look at where I am in two categories, where I want to be and how my journey is going.

The first category will be finances. I simply owe way more than I'm worth. And I'm tired of hiding it. Before I can deal with it, though, I know I have to say my total debt out loud. I've never done that - I have never spoken or written down exactly how much I owe in credit card debt. I give ballpark numbers or 'after I make this payment' estimates. So, here goes - to date, I owe $6,008 to Visa and $10,093 to MasterCard. I also just paid Discover Card, $285. There are a few charges pending on that card so I will probably owe another $300 eventually. I owe a total of $16,400. There, I've said it - out loud. And I cringed. I want it gone.

The next category will be weight. As of this morning, I am at an all-time high of 179. I lay in bed at night feeling my heart struggle with the high blood pressure. I wake up with aching knees, hips and back from the weight. I'm outgrowing my fattest clothes and can wear exactly four items from my closet. I am killing myself. My intention with this category is to lose 5 pounds a month. That's all - just five pounds. The junk food is over, the walking begins. I may check into yoga, if my finances allow me to do so. I want it gone.

So, there are my categories. I have a strategy for the weight and need to create one for the finances. That will be my next blog entry.